Update 5 pm
SHE PEED IN THE POTTY! ONCE! …She has to do it nine more times to get the hang of it and it’s already 5 pm. -_- At least Max has been less inclined to act like I’m trying to poison him whenever I feed him. He’s like a kneazle. Or is it crups that are really suspicious?
Update 11:30 am
She has peed on the floor twice. She has thrown her potty. The one she was so crazy about a couple weeks ago. Maybe she thought it was a toy. She has screamed for her daddy (“DAAAADDDYYYY!”) whilst sitting upon said potty. She always asks for the parent that isn’t currently causing her grief. She has brought me a diaper to put on her. She tried to put a diaper on...
The Potty Training Chronicles, Pt.1
6:45 am It’s one of those rare times that I’m up before my daughter. I figure it’s a good day for it, because I have to prepare myself mentally for what’s ahead. We’re potty training. For reals. Claudia had her second birthday in July. I got her a potty seat and a step stool just before her birthday. It’s not that I’m in any particular rush to get her...
Bear with me.
I think some of my straight-haired friends will think this is silly. And it is, I guess, on some level. Because it’s about my hair. I was just over at curlynikki.com, looking at this post (I <3 you, Bloglovin.). The author of that particular post was talking about how she was having a couple bad hair days; she hated her hair in that moment, and she coveted others’ hair (even her...
Because the thing is, there’s a comic out there for everyone. Reducing comics to...– Everything’s Coming Up Comics! (via bookriot)
Re: Family Life: Bad Smells.
1 - Poop a - toddler, not unlike grown up poop. In fact, it is grown up poop. b - breastfed baby poop. Rather pleasant actually, but still. Poop. c - Cat. 2 - Vomit a - young breastfed baby. EVERYWHERE ALL THE TIME. b - older formula fed baby. Smellier. Often on bedsheets. c - your own vomit, in various configurations, everyday for about 3 months. (See 3a). ...
A Sea of Penelopes
So Kourtney Kardashian gave birth to a little girl, and they hath dubbed the girl child Penelope Scotland. Let’s ignore the middle name, as celebrities have been naming their progeny after countries and land masses for years, and focus on that first one. It’s MY first name. (And congratulations to them, because new baby smell! Yay. And blood clots, and post-partum hair loss, and...
That is such a nice looking nail salon. They should all be like that. Instead of harsh lighting and Top 40 radio. srslytheblog: NEW SRSLY! RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. Alex hasn’t had to make a decision this important since Tom Cruise asked her to sign a marriage contract in 2006.
From a book of Actually Horrifying and...
As read to a persistent and annoying toddler by a half asleep mom: Three little kittens have lost their mittens and don’t know where to find them. Leave them alone and they’ll come home wagging their tails behind them. (Pause) Along came a spider in a shoe and frightened Miss Muffet’s curds and whey. (Yawn) How I wonder what you are. Now go away.
Ten rape prevention tips: →
terramantra: 1. Don’t put drugs in women’s drinks. 2. When you see a woman walking by herself, leave her alone. 3. If you pull over to help a woman whose car has broken down, remember not to rape her. 4. If you are in an elevator and a woman gets in, don’t rape her. 5. When you encounter a woman who is asleep, the safest course of action is to not rape her. 6. Never creep into a woman’s...
My daughter doesn’t like TV. She likes to dance, but only to the Law & Order and The Big Bang Theory theme songs. She turns off the TV all the time, either by walking right up to it and turning it off or using one of the two remotes. What’s more, she takes the cable remote, takes off the back cover, throws it on the floor to get the batteries out, and runs away and hides with...
@writinginbed: Rules For Girls - Summer Clothes →
TRUTH. Full underwear is extremely important. writinginbed: What a great time of year. Men look forward to this after the long hard winters and springs that keep a woman hidden under jeans and sweaters. As things get hotter, so do the outfits, but that doesn’t you have to sacrifice your dignity for a little attention and crotch nudity. Here are a few…
Top 5 Things I Say to My Daughter
5 - “Leave your brother ALONE. He’s SLEEPING.” 4 - “WHAT is the matter?” 3 - “Get off of me already.” 2 - “NO.” 1 - “CLAUDIA, GET DOWN.”
Raising kids is not unlike raising Pokemon
I’m having trouble deciding which is more cool; raising kids or raising Pokemon. When I first thought of it I immediately thought “POKEMANS ARE COOLER!” Wasn’t it just awesome when little Avatar You was walking along on a path getting to the next city when, out of nowhere: BEEP. BLOOP. There’s your Pokemon, and it does that weird little garbly thing, and it goes...
Is something wrong with me?
So I think there’s something wrong with me. I was watching Tyler Oakley’s latest video, and ALLEGEDLY, there were some pictures recently released of a gentleman named Darren Criss, who I think is on Glee. Maybe. Is he? I dunno, don’t watch it. Mr. Criss (not to be confused with Magic Man Angel) was not wearing a shirt. And there were all these pictures of him lying around...
To be a writer you should read, write and talk to people, hear their knowledge,...– Jean Craighead George (via thelifeguardlibrarian)
One-up nerd this.
When I think of being creative and sucking at it, of what people might say and think about my supreme suckiness, I think of that time that Rita Skeeter outed Hagrid as a half-giant, and Dumbledore tells him that he got an owl everyday complaining about how he ran Hogwarts, and that if Hagrid waited in his cabin holding out for universal popularity, he would be waiting for a very long time. ...
Writing In Bed's Blog: Get a clue →
writinginbed: I read two posts on facebook suggesting Adele forgot to thank the guy who dumped her. No, she didn’t forget. Why would she need to acknowledge him if he likely never acknowledged breaking her heart? She did day “rubbish relationship” so if anyone wants her to thank someone for breaking her …
*climbs onto soapbox* So last night, during the Grammys and during a Twitter convo with some peeps (who I would totally link to if I could figure out how but you know who you are) about Chris Brown and Rihanna, I tweeted that I would punch my son in the face if he was ever abusive. I thought this thought and tweeted that tweet because I happened to be holding my son at the moment. But later,...
So, when you’re the creative type, you have to just keep doing it. Keep being creative. It’s easy to get caught up in what you want it to be, and everyone wants to do or be the next great whatever. Because what’s the point of creating if no one sees it? But then you think about it too hard. You think about it and put it out there and you spend too much time hoping to be...
When they remake National Lampoon's Vacation
(Because, as we all know, Hollywood is bereft of original ideas, and are remaking every movie we’ve ever loved. Thus, it is “when”, not “if”.) Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase)- Will Ferrell COME ON. He would make a PERFECT Clark. Just try to argue that. Ellen Griswold (Beverly D’Angelo)- probably someone cute and likeable, like Amy Adams or Elizabeth Banks. ...
Things my 18 month old daughter can do
open doors (closets and rooms) if the door opens toward her. She’ll figure out the other way eventually. take the plastic socket covers out of the socket turn the TV on and off with the remote and on the actual TV same goes for the cable box turn our computers on and off work the volume knob on the speakers we keep on top of one of the computers unlock our iPhones reach ANYTHING on...
OMG I love this. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND.